tentacletrainer | Chapter 33; Accidental Video

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Chapter 33; Accidental Video

[[Today, when the gear turns on, you get a lovely view of the sky and the calming sounds of water nearby. It's a beautiful day, for those of you not outside.

This serene setting is broken by a squeal from a Pokemon and a splash, then all falls quiet and calm again.

It's a few minutes before you hear something again. This something being another splash. And then on screen appears a Dratini with a quite pathetically wiggling Magikarp in it's mouth.

With a happy chirp it disappears off camera again, only to return a few moments later to rub all over the 'gear. And then off it goes. There's a squeal, a splash, and a few minutes later the familiar sight of this Dratini with another Magikarp, struggling in it's grasp. It disappears, it reappears to smother the Pokegear, rinse, wash, repeat.

This show goes on for some time, until finally - during one of its rubbing sessions - it stops and looks up. And then it simply begins to trill in excitement. Almost like if it doesn't make noise, it'll explode. It's also wiggling.

There is so much wiggling from this Dratini.]]

...V-vodka...what are you doing?

[[It seems this Dratini is none other than Vodka Derptini - also lovingly known as John - belonging to resident Rose Lalonde. And said trainer has found the little dragon Pokemon.

She appears momentarily on screen, picking up the 'gear, before turning to look at...oh.

It seems all those Magikarp the little wiggling dragon type had been collecting are in quite the pile of flopping. Meanwhile, the aforementioned culprit of this karp congregation is sitting next to said heap, wiggling as if waiting for praise.

Apparently those fish are a gift for his trainer.]]

...That's...very nice of you, John. Thank you very much. How sweet.

[[A few pats to the Dratini's head, followed by a multitude of elated chirps, lilts, warbles and purls, and the 'gear is shut off.]]

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[ Now he's almost smiling. ]

Teach me the violin so I can turn it into the fiddle and infuriate you.

And sticks should work for training, but I can swing something for actual swords later, probably.

[[Okay that? That earns him a laugh.]]

The fiddle? Really? I believe I could teach you the fiddle if that's really what you're so interested in, or both if you'd like. The fundamentals are similar enough, after all.

Alright. I am ready for training when you are ready to teach then, Master Strider.

Okay, my eyeroll here is so fucking important, I'd almost take off my shades to make sure you knew it was happening. I am rolling my eyes so extravagantly right now, in preparation for this statement:

If you teach me how to handle a violin, trust me, I don't need any help turning it into a fiddle. I did grow up in Texas.

[ And he is rolling his eyes behind those shades. ]

Oh, my apologies. I had no intention of insulting you or your culture.

Please don't call it my 'culture' unless you're in a hurry to get out of this tree.

[ Spoken very politely, no less. ]

[[And at that statement fingers gently yet firmly curl into the fabric of his pants.]]

I do hope you realize you'd be joining me. However, since you asked so politely.

[ A surreptitious glance down at her hands. ]

You know, you're pretty touchy-feely, for such a frigid chick.

[[Dave, you shouldn't have mentioned that, because now that she realizes she's doing it? She's going to stop. Her hand is very quickly returned to herself with a careless shrug and a glance away.]]

Am I?

[ He actually laughs a little, just a soft sound in his throat. ]

Christ, you're as bad as me. I didn't say I cared.

[[Just...kind of sliding her eyes to glance at him.]]

I didn't say you did either. And does this mean you're a tad touchy-feely yourself then?

[ And he's sliding his eyes away. ]

I'm probably a little frigid.

...Mm.

[[Shifting forward a little she rests her hands on his knees and returns to lightly swinging her calves.]]

Does this mean I should pick up the slack on your end?

Hey, if you wanna touch me some more, far be it from me to stop you.

[ It's only half a joke — he really won't stop her. ]

[[A snort.]]

Oh yes, because you know I can't keep my hands off of you Strider.

[[She's so tempted. So, so tempted. To hang off of him right now. Just to see if he'll hold true to those words, or if he'd finally break and tell her to back off. But...

Well.

Tree.]]

And what happens if I desire reciprocation? Or am I just out of luck in the hug department?

[ With a long-suffering sigh: ]

I know. I guess I couldn't really deny you a hug, either. I'm pretty sure withholding my body from mortals is considered animal cruelty in the Strider realm, which goes against rule sixteen.

Does being your little sister make it any easier on you? I know it must be absolutely insufferable to have to hand physical contact out to every mortal begging your attention you see, but surely I have a special place in your heart that makes it mildly alright.

No, but you being hot helps.

[ Said with a straight face, no less. ]

[[Annnd now she's laughing again. Trying to hide it behind a hand, but it's really not working.

Give her a moment, she'll calm down.]]

Didn't think it was that funny.... [ This, dryly. ]

H-hm? [[Pardon her, just going to try and stop and clear her throat a little.]]

Ah, my apologies. Though I'm relieved to know you were meaning for that to be taken as humor.

[ Skeptically: ]

You don't seriously think you're not hot, do you? That's not what we're laughing about, right? Because that would be silly, Lalonde.

Silly? Dave, when have I ever been silly? But no, that is exactly what is being found humorous.

[[Here she holds up a finger.]]

For one, I'm pretty. At best.

[[A second finger joins her first.]]

Two, thirteen is hardly the age where one can be considered 'hot'. Fat left over from when you are an infant can often very clearly be seen, which would surely detract from one's over all image. And I am well aware of how much I still carry from childhood. So even if you continue in your attempt to flatter me, you'll have to find a more appropriate synonym.

[[And a third one.]]

And three, in case you attempt to use the argument, being of one name or another does not guarantee any degree of physical attractiveness. So no, being a Strider does not automatically make me 'hot'.

[ He listens to each point with growing amusement. When she's finished: ]

Okay, fine. We'll play it your way.

First of all, I'll give you pretty, but pretty's not the best you can do. You're gorgeous. Unironically, even. I'm never ironic about pretty girls. ... Okay, that's not true, but—

Second, in another three years, you're gonna be smokin'. Again, no irony here.

And third... Strider isn't a name. It's a lifestyle, a religion and a government.

No irony? From Dave Strider? That's hard to believe.

[[And that is all she says, because...well. She's not quite sure what else to say to any of that.]]

Like I said, I don't do ironic when it comes to pretty girls.

[ And that's mostly true. ]

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